I can't believe that Miss Grace is almost 1.5 years old. Still not walking.... Perhaps she won't. This would make some things easier, I am sure. I have been using anti-aging lotion on her after every bath, it is not doing any good. She is aging way too fast. Her little soft spot is gone, and her skin is rough in places ( like her knees, which get way too much use).
The other day I pulled out her tiny pink monkey outfit that she wore home the first day from the NICU. I got a little teary just looking at it and remembering how tiny and sweet she was. She weighed 4.8 pounds and she rocked the monkey jammies.
I didn't know it would go this fast. I know that I won't have any more children, so I find myself being sad and wistful almost before a moment has even passed...because I know it's a moment I won't get back.
We are getting ready to sell our house. I have a good agent, some boxes, some unemployed, loyal friends; a couple of smart,organized and generously helpful friends, and I'm ready to bury a statue of St. Joseph upside down in the yard. I also have Ritalin and Xanax, not to be used together, of course. Now I need a storage unit and a friend with a truck. But hey, who doesn't?
Speaking of Ritalin, resolutions, and sorting through the piles.... I've been reading a lot (on my KINDLE) on personal organization, de-cluttering, living with less, and attention deficit disorder. I have no doubt about the accuracy of the ADD label, which I have had since I was a child.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Attention Deficit Disorder.
Attention Def...
Oh look, a kitty!
As an adult, I just never really chose to acknowledge the ADD. FYI, copious amounts of Chardonnay and cigarettes will not solve your attention issues, if indeed you have ADD. After being diagnosed (again) recently, I began counseling but had to delay pharmaceutical treatment until I stopped nursing Grace, and once she fired me I started on Ritalin, very very hesitantly.
I must say I am impressed. It is helpful in ways I never would have expected... I am more patient, less overwhelmed, and my handwriting is even significantly different when taking it. Isn't that strange? I made a list of what I wanted to accomplish today right when I woke up, and then 45 minutes later, post-Ritalin, made another list. I looked them over and was amazed at the difference. The second list not only looked neater, it actually made sense and was reasonable.
The most interesting book I read about living with ADD highlighted many tips and techniques commonly utilized in 12-step programs, and outlined how these steps can be used to live better with ADD. Lucky me, I already know where the meetings are and I know the secret handshake... I'm totally hooked up.
It looks like I might be able to pull this house thing together after all. I will be relieved and much lighter after all the re-organizing, cleaning, and purging of belongings. Any and all baby stuff that I have left is going to Meggity Meg... I am so excited that she's baking a little bun in her oven.
We are quite excited about President Obama's (*squeeeeal!*)inauguration. Well, I am. Grace is just excited, and our roommate Jamie is decidedly unexcited, I think it's seasonal-affective-stuck-on- the- couch- watching- Lifetime- disorder. Oh, labels. What would I do without them? I am a non-compliant diabetic, recovering alcoholic, seasonally depressed, impulsive, ADD non-traditional single mommy. Maybe once my house is organized I'll feel like trying out that dating thing again. Or not. Boys kinda suck sometimes.
The collage at the top of this post was made with http://www.collagr.com/, by the way. It pulls pics off your flickr or photobucket page. I entered in a flickr address that contained specific pictures that I had grouped together for this purpose. I used this collage as a desktop on my computer, it is set in grayscale. Anyway, it's free, no registration, and it gives you a url that you can then paste elsewhere, send to friends, etc.
mmm. sleepy.
